Something I want to “Influence:” Stop Worrying About the Likes

I saw a meme the other day, that said something along the lines of,

“Remember when conversations didn’t revolve around the Instagram algorithm?”

If you think about it…it’s pretty wild that so much of our time is spent worrying about the most strategic time to post a photo, how many people viewed a story, or the number of likes a post receives. To be completely honest, I was this person and at times I can still find myself reverting back to this way of thinking. You know what I’d really like??..If we all stopped worrying about these metrics. Why? Because at the end of the day, none of it really matters in the grand scheme of things.

Technically speaking, yes– in the influencer marketing industry metrics matter. Brands look at your insights, they want to see how much engagement you have, and how many swipe ups you’re actually getting. So from a brand perspective, this information is useful in helping determine if a partnership will be beneficial. The point is, that all of this is irrelevant if your content is not truly authentic. The key ingredient to making it all work organically, in my opinion, is by taking your attention off the numbers and bringing it back to a place of sharing (not selling) what you truly love. Instead of focusing on a lack of engagement or your follower count, I suggest shifting your mindset to the content itself. It’s a game-changer, whether you’re using social media for your business strategy or not.

Can we take a moment to discuss the title, ‘influencer’? I personally don’t refer to myself as an influencer, but I technically work with brands as an ‘influencer’. I just don’t connect to the word itself. Because at the end of the day, I believe we all have influence whether we have 100 followers or 1 million. I think that if we consistently share what we love and what lights us up, all the dots will eventually start to connect. If there’s one thing I’m always trying to promote, it’s being REAL.

While we’re on the topic of realness, I wanted to break down the partnership side of things. I agreed to a partnership once that wasn’t exactly the right fit; but I was enticed by the dollar amount. I realized afterwards that it wasn’t the right move, and it read that way. People knew. The people who genuinely follow and love you know when you’re speaking on behalf of something you love or something you were paid to love for that moment. It only took that one experience to teach me this lesson. I think if you want longevity in this space, there’s nothing more important than being truly thoughtful and selective with the partnerships you choose and the products you promote. When you come from a place of honesty, people feel that. I’m so fortunate to have so many great partnerships with brands, and I think my followers know that when I share something, it means I genuinely use and love it. It’s about quality over quantity and maintaining integrity, because people trust what you share. It’s always my hope to either inspire or add value in some way. With that mindset, who cares about the number of likes, views, or swipe-ups?

Let’s touch on comparison for a moment. I don’t think comparing yourself to another person’s Instagram is realistic because remember, everything you see on Instagram isn’t necessarily real. It’s a heavily curated highlight reel. Comparison can be a real slippery slope. If you find yourself doing this, I personally suggest unfollowing that person with love. Or muting! Mute is the best feature ever and it can really come in handy when you don’t want to see every single aspect of a person’s life but you still want to follow and support them! I try to choose who I follow with intention: people who inspire, help, or challenge my perspectives. For me personally, nothing makes me happier than checking out the accounts that mention and follow me and often following them back to see what they have going on. Because, at the end of the day, we’re all on social media to connect with like-minded people.

Plain and simple: I didn’t build my business from likes. I built a business from authentically sharing what I love. I used to live my life based on different numbers. Maybe you’re doing it with the number of likes from a post, the number of calories you’re taking in, or that damn number on the scale. The moment you stop letting the numbers distract you is when you will begin to create something meaningful. When I share, it’s always my hope that people take what resonates with them and leave what doesn’t. So here’s to building whatever it is you’re working from a place of love and not likes.

And p.s. a great tool we recommend for people working in this space to help organize your brand partnerships and project details so they can all live in one place is Moe Assist. #gamechanger

Share This Article:

Share Pin Email Print

Comments (24)


  1. MWH Member

    Such a beautifully written article. And a nice gentle reminder about whats actually important when it comes to building and working in the influencer space. Thanks for sharing Melissa! xo

    1. Melissa Wood

      You’re welcome <3

  2. Sarah Koplowitz

    Thank you for this message and newsletter Melissa ! Being a new business owner and just starting on instagram, @beewellwithsarah I think this is really important to read! I am learning as much as I can from people like you that are genuine. Our society gets so caught up on points you bring up- likes, comparison, $, and more… but, the truth is everyone is hungry for the REAL stuff… and that’s what you deliver. Authenticity will always win.
    Thank you for your realness- vulnerability and also allowing many others have a look into your life- yes, you can control what we do see and don’t but I love that you are real and show the good, bad, and sometimes ugly. That is LIFE- we are all going through it- it’s just depends how much someone is willing to show that or not. I will continue to be a beloved follower, supporter and MWM client! Bee Well – Sarah

    1. Melissa Wood

      Awww Sarah! Thank you so incredibly much for taking the time to write this. I wish you nothing but abundance for your new business and am glad this post helped <3

  3. MWH Member

    Can I be honest? I met you through Kim years back and at a recent dinner with Ashley was trying to figure out when/where it was and I THINK it was a miike snow concert some random weekday night in NYC. I loved your energy and seeing what you were up to over the years. I started “following” your IG when the focus turned to health and workouts but found myself doing the comparing (esp around bounce back post kids) and had to unfollow with a loving heart toward myself. When I was in a different place and season with myself, I’d follow you again and either I had changed or you had (but likely both). This time around, the posts were more inspirational than enviable. I was learning and not comparing. I appreciated this new MWH energy. You became real and relatable, and so authentic for sharing more of the messy, imperfect bits. TY!

    1. Melissa Wood

      Oh my gosh what a small world! Thank you so much for all of your kind words. I’m so happy Instagram can help us all learn from each other <3

  4. MWH Member

    Loved it Melis! Keeping it real, and sharing from your heart is why I love everything you share❤️ Thank you for being you, for inspiring others to do the same and to always do (and share) what makes our heart glow😊

    1. Melissa Wood

      Thank you so much sweets <3

  5. MWH Member

    I LOVE what written 100%!!
    Imagine taking all the energy we waste picking ourselves apart, and putting toward loving and appreciating who we are, Oh! the things we would achieve , the lives we would change , and the power we would have.
    This is something we should be working on daily. Most of us don’t have the ability to see our bodies for what they are, nor understand our infinite worth as humans.
    We are innately dysmorphic .. what we see in the mirror is not reality. As long as we can remain aware of our tendency to gravitate toward negative self talk, we can ACTUALLY control it . We can stop the self- loathing dead in it’s track, tell it to go where it belongs, and remind ourselves that we are perfect as we are , and that we are , and that we are meant to shine.
    YOU are BEAUTIFUL
    YOU are STRONG
    YOU are WORTHY
    YOU are POWERFUL
    you are YOU for a reason. Now get out of your own way, and show the world what you’re made of by spreading your unique beauty!!~

    Best Regards,
    XO Dini XO

    1. Melissa Wood

      Wow! This was so beautifully written, Dini! Thank you so much for taking all of this time to do that <3

  6. samantha parris

    Beautiful! So many have already lost this genuine way of thinking and going towards $, name dropping and bragging. You are so real and relatable – Why I follow you- please just keep being you!! So appreciative – sam. Xo

    1. Melissa Wood

      Awww thank you so much Sam. You are so freaking sweet <3

  7. MWH Member

    Yes! This is why you are the only “influencer” I follow you . ✨ Thank you for being authentic!

    1. Melissa Wood

      Thank you sweets <3

  8. MWH Member

    I love this! There are so many things that resonate with me….connecting to what you love and speaking authentically is powerful. And you do that every day Melissa which is why you inspire so many people….and it makes it easy to feel connected to you. Thank you for writing this

    1. Melissa Wood

      Thank you so much, Cathy. That truly means so much to me 🙂

  9. MWH Member

    I love the insight you are sharing with us. I absolutely agree with that the digital age is magnifying the impact numbers has on our identities, and that what truly matters will always be authenticity and aligning with who our souls call us to be, but not who the metrics want us to be.

    1. Melissa Wood

      Yess! Loooove how you worded this <3

  10. MWH Member

    Loooooove this!!! Keep up the good work!
    You’re an inspiration Melissa <3

    1. Melissa Wood

      Awww thank you so much sweets <3

  11. MWH Member

    You are such a light in this space, and that shows because of your authenticity! Doing something for likes turns on an inner criticism, you end up doing things for others instead of yourself! Your cup never is filled up because it’s always pouring out! Yessss yesss Yes Melissa! This is such an important reminder! ❤️

    1. Melissa Wood

      Thank you so incredibly much for all of your kind words. I’m so happy you resonated with it <3

  12. Milania Al-Jammaly

    I’m so glad you wrote this! TBH, I used to want to be like you! I was comparing myself to you! I’m like want her hair, her clothes, her body. Then as I got to know you (through your ig), it’s not about comparison, it’s about being happy with yourself, with what you have, with your life. I have a great husband, amazing career, good health, super blessed in general. I love the message you spread, thank you for being inspirational!

    1. Melissa Wood

      Awww I am so happy you are happy with yourself and are so blessed. Thank YOU for taking the time to write such a sweet message <3


Join the Conversation

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Please Note: If this is your first comment on the site, it will first need to be reviewed before it appears.

Sign up and stay connected on the journey to becoming #MindfullyFit

Follow @melissawoodhealth

Follow Me!